By Rev. Craig Statton, CEO, Atherton
One of the most successful TV shows over the last decade has been Survivor. The motto of the show is “Outwit, Outplay, Outlast” and features a group of participants who are put in exotic and remote locations around the world. They are given the assignment of trying to be the last person to leave the island. The participants vote each week about who will have to leave the group and each episode includes several plot twists and turns. I am always amazed at how the winner is not necessarily the strongest; but usually the wisest who is able to work with different people to create a pathway to victory.
In my work as the CEO of Atherton, I watch the way many of our residents have “outwitted, outplayed, and outlasted” daunting obstacles to live well in their senior years. When I listen to their stories, it is clear that they do not allow disappointments, failures, and heartaches to become defining events of their lives. Instead, they use these as lessons for future success, motivation for new efforts, and moments to reflect on the meaning of life. Their wisdom has also been very helpful for me as I seek to live my life well. Here are some of their strategies for winning:
First, there is no substitute for good genes, but attitude is everything. Many of the seniors who live long and live well, come from a long line of elders who have lived long and lived well. Science continues to tell us that what is put into your original DNA has a lot to do with the quality of your life. Some diseases seem to run in families and though you may exercise and eat right, you may not be able to avoid this defect. We should not be distraught by this truth; medical science has made remarkable progress in so many areas and provided both detection and treatments to these diseases. But my Atherton friends would also say that even if you are living with a disease, your attitude dictates a lot about the quality of your life. These folks are thankful for the help they receive from friends, family, doctors and nurses. Many of them are prayerful and thoughtful, which allows them to find meaning and purpose in their difficulty.
Second, heartache need not be forever. One of our 100-year-old, Japanese American residents was asked about her experiences in the internment camps during WWII. She said it was difficult, but then said, “Que sera, sera, whatever will be, will be!” Her life was not defined by this horrific event. Many of our residents talk about the difficulty of losing a spouse or a child, and yet, do not allow that loss to keep them from new adventures or relationships. They have learned that life has many chapters and that healing and hope can be found, even during our heartaches. Their resilience is inspiring.
Third, having a purpose makes life worth living. Our heartaches can be a burden; but having a purpose can be a buoy which keeps your life afloat. Our purpose can change as we go through the various stages of life. When we are younger our purpose may be to grow up or get an education. When we get a job, perhaps our purpose is to rise in the company or use our talents to their fullest potential or acquire wealth. Perhaps our purpose is to raise a family. As we grow older, many of these purposes are met and we are left with the question, “What is next?”. Living with purpose when we are older is just as important as having a purpose when we are younger. Again, my Atherton friends have been my great teachers. Some have taken up a hobby and become master craftsmen. Some have decided to volunteer in clubs and activities, and feel they are making a difference in the world. Some of my Atherton friends banded together with others and started a thrift shop which helps others who are less fortunate. The point is that when we have something to live for, each day brings new enjoyment and energy.
My Atherton friends are helping me win in the game of life. But older, wiser survivors are not just found at Atherton; they are all around our Alhambra community, and have much to share that will help us all outwit, outplay and outlast.
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